Hi Reader,
One of my earliest memories is a moment of loss and grief.
I'm three years old, catching a spider in an empty jam jar. I give it a name and watch it try to climb up the sides until it suddenly stops moving. My mom sits beside me on the bed and explains that living things need air to breathe. She tells me my spider didn't have enough oxygen as I sob into the crook of her arm.
As I got older and experienced more loss and, in turn, grief, I always returned to this first lesson: living things need air to breathe.
Now, I believe grief is a terrible and wondrous thing, alive in its own way. Grief must breathe. It needs space, attention, and to be held before we can even begin thinking about a way through it.
As capitalism and empire do their best to suffocate the movements trying to break free, we encounter the horrors of what these systems are willing to do to hold on to power, including denying us space to grieve.
Still, every loss is felt. Every political loss, every crushed attempt at change, and each death caused by the imperial war machine conjures grief that reverberates through the heart of the collective.
If the road to liberation is paved by radical change, then grief is the soil that underlies every stepping stone. How do we make space for this? How do we, as changemakers, hold our grief with tenderness now while looking with wonder at what's possible? How do we let grief live?
In 2015, I regularly attended a local meetup through The Dinner Party where I met others close to my age searching for a safe place to openly grieve. Some had been grieving one life-changing loss for years. Others, like me, experienced multiple losses within a few years and just needed a starting point. Together, we puzzled through our darkest moments and opened each other up to life in ways only made possible through the experience of grief.
As you envision a liberated world, how do you honor loss? Who grieves with you? I hope the answer is someone, anyone you trust to go deep with you. There is so much to uncover in the deepest parts of ourselves, and it can be dangerous to go alone.
In this month's newsletter, you'll find some events to support you through hard times and resources on collective grief and healing at the end of the newsletter.
If you need someone to witness your grief but aren't ready to be in a group setting, I'm an email away.
Peace,
Taj